Posts Tagged ‘summer’

Here is it. The obligatory recap of what was the most fun I have had in a long time.

Going to NYC was hard for me. I haven’t been away much since 2005 when I was diagnosed with a severe panic disorder. I haven’t gone ANYWHERE without Jim by my side. I haven’t left the boys. Haven’t haven’t haven’t.

Well bitches. I have now.

Wednesday saw an influx of twittering, texting, squeeing women to the Hilton New York. There were hugs and tears and laughter. I sat back a bit and watched the scene. Surprisingly enough…I was more at home on the streets of the city than I was in that hotel. I’m familiar with New York and we are friends.

Thursday I hit the streets with some Canadians. I took them to Times Square so they could play tourist.

Me? I’d seen it before. I was busy.

We went to the Hard Rock Cafe for lunch, I had forgotten how neat the stuff in that place was.

Thursday night came and onto the first round of parties I went. I got to squish on the writers of some of my favorite blogs, women who have become my friends over the course of the past year or so.

I met Gavin Degraw.

Friday started the actual conference. I whirled around the morning, trying to orient myself to the chaos. Then I was invited to a beautiful moment. Thirty minutes that brought me to my knees. Even though the moment was all about Karen…I was able to witness it because I shook my fist at my own fears. It was huge. For so many reasons. This one moment brought so much peace to me for the rest of the weekend. I am so grateful I was able to be there.

If I hadn’t been there..I would have missed some of this awesomeness.

 

 

 

People at work have been asking me, “What did you go to New York for”.

My response? “To hang out with 2,400 of my closet friends.”

See you in San Diego.

My little corner of the Internet is buzzing. In two! weeks I will be on my way to Philadelphia International to pick up Jenn from the airport. After some serious SQUEEEEEEEEing we will be on our way back to my humble little suburb for the evening. Two! weeks from tomorrow we will wake up on HER BIRTHDAY and mosey our way up to the Big Apple courtesy of chauffeur services demanded  offered by my darling husband. (Thanks babe!)

Anywhoo. I’ve never been to BlogHer before so I can’t offer up any advice for newbies (me) and while I havebeen to NYC more times than I can count…I still get lost, so no sightseeing advice either. So. Here is what I got. A little bit about me even though I am under no illusion that I am interesting enough for anyone to truly care, hee hee.

• I am extremely awkward. Even more so around large groups. Pair that with a couple thousand women I don’t know and you will likely find me in a pool of stuttering mess.
• However…I LOVE to talk. Once you get me going I am a good time, I promise!
• I have panic attacks. I am not overly dramatic about them, but if you see me and I look like a deer in headlights? A hug would be in order. Please and Thank You. Need a hand to hold yourself? Mine will always be available.
• I dislike dressing up. While I will probably throw on a casual dress at some point during the conference, chances are I will feel somewhat out of place in it. I’ll deal. It’s cool.
• My list of people I MUST hug is about 3 pages long. Most of my absolutes have sent me cell phone numbers to ensure we find each other in the swarm of yapping women. If you haven’t and want to meet me? Send me an email with your cell to ali-at-mylifewiththem-dot-com. Capice?
• If I am for some reason on your list of people you want to meet…come talk to me! I am fairly shy though I put on a good game sometimes. *cough twitter cough* I am NO good about approaching groups alone. I am going to work on this, but…we will see.
• I have serious ADD. Oh look, something shiny! What? Who? Where was I?
• I have smaller feet than the rest of my roomies. No shoe swaps for me. Sad Panda.
• I have NEVER been away from my husband overnight unless I was in the hospital after having his babies. Can’t say that I cared much then. This is going to be a totally new experience for me. I may need someone to spoon with.
• I’m looking for someone to go walk around NYC on Thursday afternoon with the sole intention to take some pictures for a couple hours. Nothing long or crazy. Just a buddy to shoot with.
• I will be at the Starbucks in the Hilton numerous times throughout the conference. Coffee meet-ups are a must.
• I have boring hair.
• I fidget.
• I like Jager bombs and I like Blue Moon even more.
• I have no desire to be DRUNK at any point. I would like to maintain a constant level of tipsy. Let’s do that.
• I have some guilt about leaving the boys and coming to this conference at all. I am going to try damn hard to tell the guilt to suck it and have a good time.
• Have I mentioned I want to meet you?

De-Lurk PLEASE! Leave a comment, I want to know what is going on with you!

Are you coming to BlogHer? Are you partying with the Blogher-at-Home ladies? Are you doing something else insanely awesome that weekend? Are you stuck working?

So. We got back last night from a week at the beach. A very un-internet friendly week , but a week at the beach regardless. The boys were so amped up to go, Chase did nothing but ask every day “We go beach today”. Whether or not he really knew what he was excited for is another thing all together. Every day the two boys would stand and look out the window…asking if we were at the beach yet. Apparently they started with the “Are we theres yet” before we had even left. Tee Hee.

We really had an awesome week in Ocean City, Maryland. We got there every year, and we get the same house so we know what to expect. Chase and Jimmy did OK. They were a little out of sorts just not being home, but so happy to be with the whole family. Chase LOVED the waves this year, which was a huge difference from last year. (I don’t have any pics to post of them physically on the beach because I took them with my point and shoot…and now can’t find the cable. Grrr) Our house is AWESOME. This is the veiw from the back deck.

Sunday was the 4th of July. I LOVE Independence Day. I don’t know if it is just a side effect from living near Philadelphia, but I love it. I love BBQ’s and fireworks and the whole deal. After dinner we hung out outside and the boys played with trucks and did some bubble chasing.

Ocean City puts on a pretty spectacular fireworks display, and we were able to watch them from out front balconies. There were also tons of fireworks on the beach so once it was completely dark  we spent a lot of time running from the front to back of the house watching all the shows.

My favorite image from the whole day is not of fireworks. It’s not of the boys. It’s not of the beach. It is a simple statement, marked against a beautiful sky.

I love our flag.

Two weeks ago yesterday I took Chase to the doctor for a red swollen area behind his left ear. It looked a little hivey, but since nothing new had been introduced to him I figured we would go have it looked at. Chase’s pediatrician told us it was probably a reaction to a bug bite, and maybe it was a bit infected. We left the office with a ten day script for some antibiotics.

A couple days later the redness had spread some, so back into the doctor we went. We saw another doctor in the group, and he said it wasn’t anything he was very concerned about but to continue the antibiotics and add some Zyrtec to the mix to see if that helped. We gave him the Zyrec that afternoon and immediately saw a huge difference. We figured he got bit by a spider and had had a little allergic reaction, and maybe a bit of an infection. There was a big sigh of relief when the redness went down.

Chase finished his antibiotics last Saturday and this Wednesday I noticed a red splotch on his left cheek. Over the course of Wednesday and Thursday it across his cheek and the center took on a pale look to it while all around it was red.

Back into the doctor we went.

Diagnosis?

Lyme’s Disease.

We are fortunate that Chase presented with the bulls-eye rash. The theory is that the original redness was the tick bite being a bit infected, and now he is presenting the bulls-eye. The course of treatment is three weeks of oral antibiotics. He should be fine, it is highly unusual for there to be any issues after it has been caught so early.

I hate this part of being a parent. I hate the feeling in your stomach when you JUST KNOW something is not right. I hate watching the doctor examine my child. I hate having to give him medicine. I hate the idea that something could take him away from me.

Chase was lucky, but a lot of kids go undiagnosed until they become symptomatic. Check your kiddies before bed for ticks if you live in an area that Lyme’s is prevalent in. We live in an area where Lyme’s is hugely active and we are vigilant about checking the boys. However not all ticks latch, some just bite and fall off so watch any bites carefully.

In the mean time? I would like to wrap the boys head to toe in plastic wrap and ensure nothing gets in. Think I can do that? No? Damn.

I am seriously running on empty over here. Class is killing me. Work is kicking my ass. The boys are all over the place and the kitten has made it so I can’t walk across the room without little razor sharp claws attacking my ankles. I was going to do a little list of things that are bothering me (see above) but I decided to do some things that are making me happy instead. Cause, you know. I am all about rainbows and unicorns and shit. Or not.

I like my job. No really. I do. It has it’s moments and holy hell there is drama and bullshit everywhere. However, I work with 90% women…there is no way around the drama. I am thankful every day to have that job and to be able to help support my family and provide insurance for them. It is so important for me to be able to do that for them.

I leave for vacation at the beach in 23 days. A week of fun in the sun with Jim and the boys. We go every year with his family and it is always so much fun. The boys get to see Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop every day for a week and there is nothing better than that in their world. I can’t wait to relax and to especially spend some much needed time with Jim.

 In 21 days my class will be over. I will be done working this wack ass schedule to accommodate my class. I will be done with my entrance exam for the clinical portion of the nursing program. At this point I don’t even care if I get in for the year I am applying for…I just want the application process to be over.  I will then be off for 6 weeks before the hell of fall classes start.

In 54 days I will head down the Philadelphia International Airport and tackle Jenn when she gets off the plane. I am SO.EXCITED to have her here. Then in 55 days we will head to NYC for BlogHer, even though we will be a couple days early. The idea of a couple days and nights that I can be myself, and not have to change diapers and fill cups is amazing.

Chase is potty training. Like for realz this time. I think. Or maybe he will wake up tomorrow and decide he wants nothing to do with it like he did a month or so ago. But we are on day two going strong! He uses his little potty all by himself without me reminding him at all. However…he has to be naked. He refuses to pull his pants down to go. I’m not sure how to get over this hurdle but we will figure it out I guess!!

So yeah. I’m tired and worn out and the circles under my eyes have their own time zones…but there are some really good things on the horizon!

It’s official. The countdown portion of my year has begun! The next 2 months are jam packed with craziness and I absolutely CANNOT wait.

Last Monday started my summer session of classes. I’m taking Abnormal Psychology and so far so good. All it is really showing me is how crazy my mother really is. But I knew that already, and it was reaffirmed to me today. Crazy. Some days I am seriously glad that I am adopted and none of that is in my genes. Gah.

Anyway…backtracking. The class is 6 weeks long or so, placing the end day as July 1st. I had to rearrange my work schedule to accommodate the class and found myself working 7 weekends in a row. Seven. BOO. However…at the end of the seven weeks come (drum roll please) A WEEK AT THE BEACH. Thank the sweet baby Jesus because I need a fracking break. For realz.

So we come back from the beach and then there is only a couple weeks until BlogHer! I am so excited to be going. Not just to meet these amazing people who are such a huge part of my life. Not just to juggle the bull’s balls with someone I can’t wait to booze with. Not just to be kid and husband free in my favorite city in the world. Not even just to Nom Nom on the cutest baby ever.

I am excited to be taking a step. A step away from the anxiety that has grounded me since 2005. A step away from being too afraid to put myself out of my comfort zone. A step that I should have taken a long time ago. A step that will probably take some xanax and some hand holding.

I think I just need one more thing. Some killer shoes.

I am not sure I have ever touched the Gulf Of Mexico with my toes. I don’t think I have ever allowed the waves to crest over my feet, or dig into the white sand. I am now worried that I may not get that chance.

I grew up in a little town tucked sweetly into the bay between Atlantic City and the New Jersey mainland. Seagulls perched in our trees and the sounds of them cawing to each other followed you throughout your day. While playing in the yard…you had to only dig down the smallest bit before you hit water. Walking to the end of my street brought you to the marsh and the water. Trucks pulling boats were a normal sight as they approached the dock down the road.

I understand the fierce feelings that those living on the Gulf are experiencing. The relationship with the sea that those have that live on it is a special thing and one that is not easily explained. Every year my family heads to the beach for the year and for that week…I feel at ease and at home. Jim always has a joke about how every year, the last thing I do before I leave is go touch the water and say goodbye. I feel a kinship with the ocean, this ebbing, ever changing woman who supports so many.

I am praying that the oil is controlled soon. I am praying that the currents don’t take it even further than expected. I am praying that hurricane season doesn’t move it in unpredictable ways.

I am praying for those that love it.

I am praying that I get a chance to one day come down and say hello to her. To touch my hands to her clean water and introduce myself to another part of this ocean that I love so much.

A couple weeks ago my little notch of south eastern Pennsylvania had a bit of a heat wave. Weather was anywhere from 70 to 90 degrees and it was glorious. Jim and I were off together and decided to take the boys up to a little place near our house. It’s an orchard and a cute little store that you can buy pies and doughnuts and all sorts of things I shouldn’t be eating. You can pick apples or pumpkins depending on the season. There are hayrides and flowers and it is such a great little place.

There is also a little playground that the kids made the most of. They love to be outside and run and run and run.

Chase will take a break from running to take a pass down the slide.

Jimmy only pauses to crawl in the dirt.

Then? They saw the goats. THEN? They realized they could feed them.

That made for some ridiculously happy baby men. I so cherish being able to spend time with them. My life is going to get insanely hectic for the next couple years and I am so afraid I am going to miss out on some of this time with them. They deserve a million days out playing in the sun with us.

                           

It’s been raining forever. Seriously. We are going a bit loony here being cooped up inside all the time. Chase turned two on the 24th of July, and a majority of his presents from Jim and I were to make the yard more fun for him. He LOVES to be outside!

I ordered everything online, and then sat back to wait for the FedEx truck. Sigh. I hate waiting. I am not a patient person. Finally! Everything is here, we are so excited to get the stuff put together for Chase to play on!

And it rains.

And rains.

And rains.

One of the things we got was a small slide. Finally after a few days of rain I gave up. I wasn’t waiting anymore. It was going up come hell or high water. It was his birthday dammit and he was going to play on his slide.

Who cares if it was in the living room! He had an awesome time. Don’t mind Jim, he was trying to do something manly to fix the bottom part. I don’t know.

Sliding in the living room quickly became the new cool thing to do..

Even Jimmy got in on the action. I love this little baby raptor SQUEEEEEE he does! So yeah. The moral of the story? Putting a slide in the living room makes for teh happy kiddies!

When you become a mother you become whole and lose some of yourself all at the same time.

You gain this amazing little person, who changes your life in a blink of an eye, and you can’t remember what life was life before they were in it. Your whole world revolves around them, and you live to keep them safe and happy. They can make your day with a first smile, a new tooth or a gurgle laugh. Yet…somehow you lose a bit of yourself. You might not notice right away, it might come slowly or it might hit you with a bang, but it will come.

I was just starting to find myself again when Chase was 9 months old. He was getting older, it was easier to leave him with a sitter and be able to get out and do some things for me. Then I found out I was pregnant with Jimmy. *sigh* I was thrilled to be pregnant, after the inital shock of finding out your expecting when you religiously take birth control, but deep down I knew that this meant I had to start all over.

I was going to have a newborn again. I was going to have an 18month old and a newborn. I was screwed.

I was one semester into my return to collge after a 7 year hiatus. I liked my hours at my job. My life worked finally, and things were on a balance that I was happy with. Here we go again.

Jimmy is now 6 months old, and I’m still struggling to find myself again. Twitter helps, I don’t feel nearly as isolated when I’m home all day now that I have some of my favorite people at the end of my fingertips.

Blogging helps. Being able to connect with people, and read other people’s stories is such a gift. I am appreciative of every post that each of you write, it gives me a view into your world that I rely on.

So I did something last weekend that was entirely selfish and just for ME. It felt awesome. For the first time in two years I put ME before everyone else in my family. I bought a ticket to BlogHer10 in New York City for next August.

I’ll see you there bitches.